Grandma, Holding Strong (As of 9/7/2007)

Remember Sarah Van Etten? Maybe the word "Grandma" will jog your memory. That's right, everyone's favorite narcoleptic, turn-a-blind-eye beer purveyor from Ithaca. This hard-hitting expose (some might say Daily Sun hatchet job) was a long time coming. Even the MSM has picked up Grandma's story.

We learn that Grandma likes the work:

Grandma said that her favorite part of the job is “dealing with the people.” Interacting with kids — especially teenagers — is tough, she said. She added that, in general, she has a very interesting, never-boring job. Grandma said the students are all good kids and she appreciates the help they give her by lifting heavy 30-packs and shoveling her walkway.

Of course, it might have occurred to Grandma to reward these sweet youngsters with Twizzlers, not 40's of Cobra.

The feel-good story takes another ugly turn:

In 2004, police caught a high school student drinking in Stewart Park in downtown Ithaca, and he said he got the alcohol from her store. She assumed “he stole it here” — but she was strapped with a $6,000 dollar fine.

A logical assumption to make, considering Sarah's scrupulous enforcement of federal law and careful scrutiny when it comes to potential offenders.

Grandma leaves us with a stern warning:

“watch out for ‘townies’ — they’re bad.”

Indeed, Grandma. Indeed. As Doug Adams would say, so long, and thanks for all the beers.